So June has been a wonderful month for me as a missionary. I have learned a lot. Before my mission, I always cringe every time I hear the word "repent".. It's like too heavy and too scary and too hard to bear to hear the word "repent".
But this month, it has become one of my favorite words: Repent and Repentance.
During the month of June, our apartment had a problem with water. There were days we had no water for us to wash our clothes, dishes, take a bath, even drink! And because of that, I have come to appreciate the "water pump" outside our apartment where we could get water for our bathe and washing our dishes.
I just thought that my life without the Atonement of Jesus Christ feels like an apartment without that "water pump" -- I feel dirty and disgusting after the whole day of dirt and sweat. Life is messy, with all the used dishes and bathroom ... you want to clean, but there's no water to clean. You want to feel clean, BUT YOU JUST CANT.
What if Christ didn't suffer for me? I would feel disgusted with myself forever just as how I felt sad and terrible every time I act less than what the Lord expected me to be -- every time I get impatient, every time my mind wanders, every time I think of something not in line with my purpose. Every time I fall short.
I repent. I repent. I just want to repent. I want water. I need water. Please tell me where to get that water. I want to feel fresh, to feel new. I want to be clean. I need to be clean. That's how I felt every time!
Grateful to have that water pump .
Grateful for the atonement of Jesus Christ -- for giving me that chance to repent and changed for the better.
I have come to realized that repentance is anything we do that helps us come closer to Christ. Stop doing things that are wrong, do things that are right. When one strives to be more focused and diligent, he is repenting. We repent everytime we strive to overcome every sin and bring all into subjection to the law of Christ.
I got only 9 months left, and I should repent and repent daily. Every minute if necessary.
I do not know who said it but this general authority asked: " Who is righteous? Anyone who repents is righteous. A wicked man, no matter how wicked he has been, if he repents then he is righteous. A good man, no matter how good he has been, if he doesn't repent -- then he is a wicked man."
Repentance -- such a beautiful word. I feel peace not cringe everytime I hear it.
It is a positive experience that brings joy and peace. (PMG, 8)
Grateful to have my anak, Sister Maroket who led every phase of the work this week. She's perfect. She's a gift to me. She has made my mission a wonderful experience. She gave me that boost to start my next half of my mission. She's wonderful. She tries, perseveres, and helps me do the same at my own pace. She tries to be better everyday. She perseveres, and she has improved everyday (in fact, she could train, if called upon, next cycle.. No bias! I am telling the truth)
And she allows me to try, to persevere, as she forgives me every time I get impatient. I love her, heart and soul.
I am the luckiest trainer in the whole world.
I love being a missionary!